The National Weather Advisory Service has issued a Severe PMS Warning for the following counties….
Expect fair conditions in the morning, turning ragey with an 80-percent chance of psychosis by late afternoon, and continuing through the evening. Under certain conditions, psychosis can produce massive shitstorms, with potential for significant damage to person and property.
This warning remains in effect until further notice. Be on the alert for death-stares, foot-tapping, silent treatment, and other indicators that a shitstorm is approaching. Residents are advised to walk on eggshells for the duration, and to seek shelter immediately if a shitstorm strikes in their vicinity.